I'm beginning to think there's something seriously wrong with me. I can't stand being around people anymore. Like, no matter who it is, I just don't want to be around anyone. I have absolutely no desire to do anything anymore. I don't look forward to anything. I dread going to work every day because it means interacting with people. I swear, there has to be a root cause. I'm thinking my depression symptoms are starting to come back....maybe time to get a new antidepressant because this is not normal.

DH got me a card saying something along the lines of "I want to go through the rest of life with you". It frustrates me how much more he desires me than I desire him right now.

I'm not voting for Biden. I'm voting for Kamala Harris. Also, I don't think Trump ever wanted to be POTUS. I think he entered the race to get publicity for his brand as a way to make money, which he was quickly running out of. I don't think he ever even remotely expected to win. He has absolutely no idea what he's doing. He has no desire to learn what he's doing. He never wanted the job. But he kind of got to the point where he was in too deep to back out. He's basically just living in the White House and playing golf, but not actually working nor did he ever intend to. He doesn't give a rat's ass about policy; he just wants to make money.

I have NO desire to do side work. People ask me all the time to do side work. Usually QuickBooks consultations/training. I hate doing it. I agreed to a side job over the weekend, and I already regret it and I haven't even started yet. It's decent money ($35/hr) but on the whole it's not worth it. If I only worked PT and needed the money, I'd do more side work. Other than that, I'll 'side' work in my garden. :D

I write press releases for our organization sometimes. I asked someone in our working group for a quote, which she sent to me. It ended up having a lot of references to Christianity in it. As a public org it's best for us to be neutral, so I told her I that I respected her beliefs but needed to ask her if she would feel comfortable with me editing the quote or would she rather I ask someone else. She said she did not want to edit it and I told her I respected that. Four days later she texts me at 10:30 pm to tell me how much this offended her. I told her It had nothing to do with her beliefs or mine- only my desire to do our communications work up to the highest standard, that she is entitled to her feelings but that I stand by my decision. I get really tired of slapping a smile on my face and thanking people for their feedback. I have feelings and beliefs too, but I'm a professional. I'm proud of the fact that I was able to validate her feelings without apologizing for doing my job.

My dh chose to have some family over yesterday as a "gesture of goodwill" to smooth over some issues from Christmas, and I am worn out. I haven't left the couch even to clean up the mess. I could sleep for a year. Some people, specifically these people, just exhaust me. They require so much energy, they're like vampires or something. I feel bad for sitting in all this mess, but I am exhausted. I don't see the need to drain myself for people who are never happy no matter how much you give them, but marriage is about compromise I guess. He gets his desired outcome, I nap for 3 days.

I'm losing weight again. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I can't eat like a normal person. I haven't actually cooked anything in weeks. DH cooks sometimes. It's mostly sandwiches and salads if/when I eat. I'll spend 15 minutes peeling a freaking grapefruit and get every little bit of white off of it and then have no desire to actually eat it. I have no energy to do any yoga. I miss my kids so much I think I might actually die. Like wither up and turn into a husk. When is this gonna be over? I am having serious trouble just doing normal life things without having a breakdown. I can't work. And I need to. Fuck.

I've been a marriage counselor for almost twenty years. Sometimes, actually, surprisingly often, people just don't want to be married anymore. They fall out of love. They fall in love with someone else. They want Independence. They just don't want to be married anymore. And it's okay. It's normal. More people should have the courage to live authentically. Not saying it's an easy situation to navigate, but wanting someone to stay with you when they don't want to stay with you is nothing more than a desperate desire to not be alone. And falling back on "but the Bible says" or "you made a VOW" is nonsense. Those are not good reasons to keep someone bound to you.

I ask this out of pure curiosity, not snarkiness..how is it a biological issue and not an emotional one? You physically don't have to keep eating, I would think the desire to binge is mostly in your head, not a physical symptom? I apologize if it sounds bitchy or like I'm judging, because I'm not. I'm just curious.

I am a 48 year old attorney who has never been and has no desire to be married. RubberCity- you're an asshole for insinuating people like me are single because successful women can't find a man. I've been proposed to, but I'm never getting married. All studies show that single women are happier than their married counterparts. Women initiate 80% of all divorces. Why? Because in most cases, marriage sucks for women. Then end up doing twice the work. Sorry, I'm not cooking, cleaning, etc. for anyone who is totally capable of doing these things themselves. And in most marriages, that's what ends up happening. I'm not making this up; you can get on the Google machine and look it up yourself. Despite what they think, men aren't all that awesome. And now that women can and do earn their own money, there's really no reason for us to get married.