My sister in law is one of my favorite people. I absolutely adore her. She has always had a bit of a weight problem, but no big deal (I have too). But over the past 10 years, it has gotten much, much worse. I just saw her last weekend, and she is easily over 400 pounds right now. She is wildly successful professionally and still works, manages kids, etc, but you can tell she's really struggling. She's losing mobility. We also both turned 50 this year and not getting any younger. I would never say anything, because it's not like she doesn't already know. And nothing I say will do anything other than make her feel worse. But I am so, so worried about her. I don't want to lose her, but I really don't think she'll be around in 10 years if something doesn't change. It makes me sad.

The Doctor said there's nothing wrong with me. I am 100% not surprised. In my experience if they can't prescribe a pill or do a surgery they don't want to deal with you. I told her I was having anxiety over mysterious weight loss and I swear to god she rolled her eyes. Told me at my age (48), any anxiety is probably pre-menopausal. GOD how I love doctors. My fucking favorite. And I paid $400 for the appointment and a lab test. For her to tell me I'm old and roll her eyes at me. On a happier note, I have been able to get up to 115lbs and stay there for a few weeks. And I bought new underwear that actually fit and that actually makes me feel WAY more normal. LOL. Loose underwear just makes you feel less than human somehow.

I have an appointment next week. I've been losing weight for over a year, slow but sure. I've been between 130-135lbs my entire adult life and now I have to eat constantly to even stay above 110lbs. It doesn't seem like much but it's freaking me out and none of my clothes fit. I feel like a skinny old hag.

Randomly losing weight when you're not trying isnt normal.. You need to see a doctor!

Well it's official. I'm nearly 50 years old and I just ordered training bras because regular women's bras don't fit me anymore. Even the XS bras are too big. I also bought men's jeans because apparently size 2L doesn't exist. The retail clerk told me to try the little boy's section when I asked her if they had a 2L. Would have been great, but they weren't long enough. So I went online and ordered men's stretch slim fit jeans in a size 26X32. I don't understand why I keep losing weight, I really don't.

I am so unhappy with my life. It seems like no matter how much money we have, a nice house with enough room for all of us is always too much. No matter that his shop is 3x the size of the house and he has 3 racecars. And he just disgusts me lately. I'm not saying I haven't gained some weight over the years, but his weight and his attitude and his lack of care for me and himself is just so overwhelmingly disgusting. I don't know how I'm supposed to keep staying with him. I don't know if this is a phase, if it's just me, or if he really is just not it for me.

Down to 1k/1.2k calories a day of 98% fruits, veggies, and grains and one drink as a treat, walking 1-2 miles a day and doing pilates every day and cannot shift this weight at all. I want to lose 30 pounds, but realistically I know if I don't start seeing results I'm going to give up again. Ive lost maybe 1/2 inch in my waist, but gained inches everywhere else too. I hate this.

Back to tracking my meals on Noom because I've regained 5 lbs from my weight loss. I've been here before- I have a couple meals out. Too busy to cook or there's a celebration. Or not feeling well and just want toast. Too much backsliding and I feel like I got re-addicted to carbs! Tonight I'm at that weird point where I've been "good" all day and have enough calories left to eat another meal but I'm not that hungry and we already ate dinner. I know myself- this is the point where I start snacking and I blow it. Sitting here thinking about popping some popcorn. Lord give me strength! I'm not kidding!

I'm having bariatric surgery next week. It started out as a last ditch effort to get the weight off, but after many months I was told my body is failing me, so my goal now is much more than that. I have shared my journey with a few people and have told DH that I will decide who knows and how much. SD45 called him yesterday and I was doing stuff so didn't hang around. Thirty minutes he said 'I told her how well your pre-op doc appointment went yesterday.' I snapped around and asked what she said and his reply was 'she's having surgery? What kind?' And he proceeded to spit it all out! I am SO pissed at him! He had to know from the jump that she didn't know, yet he filled her in. I'M SO PISSED! She will tell everyone back home and it is MY decision to share it. He took that away from me dammit!!!

After several really intense Depressive months with some dark thoughts, I feel like the fog is lifting. I know I will have some more challenges ahead, but I'm optimistic. One day, just felt sick of self-sabatoging with junk food/tv and shame spiral which kept me stuck. As a result, I had huge weight gain and don't have a lot of close relationships due to avoidance. Recently I made a point to track my daily habits, move my body daily, eat nurturing foods, and return to yoga/meditation/gratitude. It all sounds simple, but what a lifesaver. I can feel myself getting stronger. At this stages in my life, I'm just tired of hating myself and want stop the BS. This is the best I've felt in months. I followed up about a gig, trimmed my bangs a little differently than usual. I can actually look at myself in the mirror now with kindness and compassion instead of self-pity and despair. It's crazy what a mood booster a haircut can be along with taking it one day at time can do. You got this!